Humor und Satire

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List-Makers' Club


A group of staff recently bought their own filter machines and formed their own "coffee club." Lists started appearing on the walls of the coffee corner -- lists of club members, lists of coffee-making instructions, lists of coffee minders, lists of club rules, etc. Yesterday a new list appeared, created by a staff member (David White, who prefers to remain anonymous):

List-Makers' Club:

1. A new list should be typed and attached to this cupboard at least once a week; preferably more frequently.

2. The list of people responsible for making lists will be
maintained and posted here regularly.

3. Any list should be outlined in coloured marker and have many key words similarly outlined.

4. Any one failing to maintain his list will be put on the black list.

5. A list of people on the black list will be posted unless those people are already on a list (such as the coffee list -- also known as the brown list) in which case they will be removed from that list and their names entered on the list of people with no lists.

6. Before anyone can remove his name from a list, his name should first be put onto the list of people who do not want to be on lists.

7. Anyone who is listless should be entered on the list of listless people. This list of listless people should be maintained separately from the list of people who are not on a list.

8. If any of these instructions is not clear, then please enter your name on the list, listing clearly your problems with the list.

9. Anyone in this room wishing to drink anything whilst reading the lists will find two pots of coffee standing under the lists.