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Will Microsoft Acquire Compuserve?

Microsoft

The Top Ten Signs that H & R Block may have sold Compuserve to Microsoft:

10. When you try to log in, a message tells you there will be a 15-month delay.

9. Your new password requires a character only on Microsoft keyboards.

8. When you go into Chat mode, you get a message that says "Shouldn't you be working?"

7. No matter how you try to get into JForum, you keep getting routed to Waggener Edstrom.

6. The Information Highway slows to a crawl, except for the geeky guy with the custom sports car doing 120.

5. Every time you try to do a download, you have to sign a nondisclosure agreement first.

4. You keep getting a message that says "Forum capacity exceeded - use your credit card to sign up for the priority access plan now."

3. Online photos of Steve Ballmer all show him having hair.

2. Customer support seems to put you on hold longer, and now it's a 900 number.

And the #1 sign that H & R Block may have sold Compuserve to Microsoft:

1. The hourly rates drop, but all the modems are locked at 110 bps.