Humor und Satire

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An Engineering Thesaurus


It is in the process
So wrapped up in red tape that the situation is almost hopeless

We will look into it
By the time the wheel makes a full turn, we assume you will have forgotten about it too

A program
Any assignment that cannot be completed by one telephone call

To confound confusion with commotion

The trail left by interoffice memos

The guy who has a desk between two expeditors

Consultant (or expert)
Any ordinary guy more than 50 miles from home

To activate
To make carbons and add more names to the memo

To implement a program
Hire more people and expand the office

Under consideration
Never heard of it

A meeting
A mass milling by masterminds

A conference
A place where conversation is substituted for the dreariness of labor and the loneliness of thought

Getting used to working again

Reliable source
The guy you just met

Informed source
The guy who told the guy you just met

Unimpeachable source
The guy who started the rumor originally

A clarification
To fill in the background with so many details the foreground goes underground

We are making a survey
We need more time to think of an answer

Let's get together on this
I'm assuming you're as confused as I am

Give us the benefit of
We'll listen to what you have to say as long your current thinking as it doesn't interfere with what we've already decided to do

To give someone the big picture
A long, confused and inaccurate statement to a newcomer

That nonsensical series of characters which is scotchtaped to the front of your terminal