Humor und Satire
Computerwelt
Q: How many programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: That's a hardware problem.
Q: How many programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Two. One always quits in the middle of a project.
Q: How many Windows programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: 472. One to write WinGetLightBulbHandle, one to write WinQueryStatusLightBulb, one to write WinGetLightSwitchHandle...
Q: How many OS/2 programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: I think that's a device driver problem.
Q: How many program managers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Let's get the marketers involved. I think we can sell this as a feature.
Q: How many managers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Three. Two to hold the ladder and one to screw the lightbulb into a faucet.
Q: How many LUE managers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: We've formed a task force to study the problem of why lightbulbs burn out and to figure out what, exactly, we, as managers, can do to make the lightbulbs work smarter, not harder.
Q: How many PC repair people does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: PC Repair has received your Email concerning your hardware problem and has assigned your request Service Order Number 39712. Please use this number for any future reference to this case of trouble. As soon as a technician becomes available you will be contacted.
Q: How many support people does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: We have an exact copy of that lightbulb here and it seems to be working fine. Can you tell me what kind of system you have? OK. Just exactly how dark is it? OK. There could be four or five things wrong. Have you tried the light switch? Well, try it now. OK. Look over by the door. Is there a little rectangular thing on the wall? It might be a beige color. Good. That's called a light switch.
Q: How many help writers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. In the future, we can move all of our docs on line, which means people won't need books or lightbulbs.
Q: How many developers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: The lightbulb works fine on the system in my office. NOT REPRO.
Q: How many C++ programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: You're still thinking procedurally. A properly-designed lightbulb object would inherit a change method from a generic lightbulb class, so all you'd have to do is send it a bulb.change message.
Q: How many group assistants does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: One.
Q: How many Win CIM support technicians does it take to change a light bulb?
A: A call to WInCIM's Help Desk revealed the following answer: "We have an exact copy of the light bulb here, and it seems to be working fine. Can you tell me what kind of system you have? OK. Now, exactly how dark is it? OK, there could be four or five things wrong ... have you tried the light switch?"
Q: How many NISA testers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: We just noticed the room was dark; we don't actually fix the problem.
Q: How many WinCIM technicians does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Three. Two holding the ladder, and one to screw the bulb into the faucet.
Q: How many FEEDBACK guys does it take to change a light bulb?
A: CUSTOMER SERVICE has received your request concerning your hardware problem and has assigned you request service number 39,712. Please use this number for any future references to this light-bulb issue.
Q: How many NISA Forum Developers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: The light bulb works fine on the system in my office ...